Not The Nine O'clock News

Hmmm, was having one of my insomniac session last night, went thru some old tapes of British Humor about Lawyers in court:-

Situation 1
There were three lawyers, sitting at the bench addressing the judge:-

Lawyer A stood up and mentioned "In this court, I appear for the plaintiff".
Lawyer B stood up and mentioned "In this court, I appear for the defendent."
Lawyer C stood up " In this case, I appear to be in the wrong court room"

Situation 2
There was one time in the UK, you can become a barrister by going thru distant learning and the standards of English in the courts were appaling. Lawyers could not pronounce even the simplest of words. As this lawyer/barrister was summing up his argument, he kept pronouncing the words horrendously and as he came to the word "tissue", he kept pronouncing it as "tiss-sway" of life.

The judge, getting impatient with the barrister, corrected him by saying "It A-tish-shoo"," A-tish-shoo", to which the barrister responded "Bless U , my lord".

-